Turned Tables.

 

Chapter 1- Kashyap

I tapped on to the power button to scroll down the notification bar. I could see the alarm showing three more minutes to go. I was pretty proud of myself for waking up early by three minutes. I know it doesn’t make much sense. But trust me, for a non-morning person it’s no less than an achievement. I stared at the screen until the alarm rang and I shut it in one go. The mornings with no snooze go very rare in my calendar. I walked up to the kitchen and brewed myself a strong coffee. I am usually very punctual with my coffee proportions. I made sure it was strong enough with hardly any sugar in it. People often label me as a psychopath looking at my sugarless coffee. But its dam worth it for sure.

My mobile made a beep on the kitchen counter. This time, as I scrolled down, there was a notification from Ishaan.

“ bhai, its mummy pappa ka 25^th anniversary. Make sure you come. Ive just invited a few from our friend’s circle. So please come. Kaam me kaam ham sab bhi mil lenge and lets party. Its been an year Kashyap. Lets meet. Don’t forget idiot. Note the date- 17^th nov “

“ wow I would definitely come. And its uncle aunty’s 25^th broo where is a proper invitation and all? btw for your info, its not even an year its 10 and half months since the end of college. Don’t go for cinematic reunion drama lol.” I texted back.

“ya ok whatever. Just come.. party is important. You seriously expect an invitation? Shut up and come. Kaam bhi bohot pada hai karneko.”

I shut his chat after sending him a thumbs up emoji followed by a laugh. I then scrolled down to that one contact to see if I had got a reply- Kavya. As usual there was none. My last message from my end was a week back and it read,

“ I made dal kichdi today. And I ended up thinking about you again. I know its silly of me but just wanted you to know.”

The message had a couple of blue ticks but with no further response. I know I shouldn’t expect a response from her after all this time. It’s been almost 11 months since our breakup and she hasn’t spoken to me after that. Neither have we spoken, nor have we met since then. But yeah, like people say, every breakup has one person who moves on and one that’s stuck in the memories. I guess its me in this case. I wanted to text her again and ask how she was doing. But I realized it would piss her off.

Before I could shut my screen, there popped another text.

“ hey …morning Mr grumpy!”  Richa knew I was never a morning person. In fact, she knew a lot more about me than I thought. Fishy right? And, not to lie, I sometimes do suss things in her behavior or the way she talks to me. It sounds strange for me to acknowledge the fact that someone is actually showing interest in me. I have no clue what runs in her head. I have already mentioned Kavya’s tale to her a million times and she seems to have understood that I haven’t moved on. I know it sounds weird. But duh! Women!

I gave a tiny pause and texted back a  good morning. The message was sent an in no time and the couple of blue ticks appeared almost immediately. But honestly, Richa has been an amazing friend to me after college. Coping with a breakup can never be easy until you have a shoulder to cry on and a friend who gives you some safe space to talk about. Keeping her what-so-ever intentions aside, I feel really glad to have found a down to earth, understanding friend like Richa.

The day started pretty boring and I made sure I started early to be on time at the office. I had a meeting and I dint want to miss it at any cost.

I had almost reached office and I sensed my phone buzz again in my pocket. I clicked it open to see that, Ishaan had created a WhatsApp group and the first message was an invitation to his parent’s anniversary. I clicked open the participants list and there it was, the third contact from the top read Kavya. I smiled for a second and walked towards my cubicle. I scrolled down to Richa and there was already a message from her end.

“where are you? There is a meeting in half an hour. How could you be so late and irresponsible Kashyap.. ughhh come quickly.”

Was she panicking about the meeting? Yes. Was she stressing over the presentation? Hell yeah! Richa’s panic mode was not new to our team. I stopped at the corridor pantry to grab a cup of green tea and walked to her cubicle.

“How long did you take? Mail me the copy of verified results from yesterday.” She spoke in a sharp tone.

“ yes... on it ma’am. ! here have this and cool down.” I handed her the green tea and in no time mailed her whatever was needed.

“ Kashyap! This is all thoroughly verified right? I don’t want any stone unturned.” I could only concentrate on her brows which had risen so high as she talked.

“ yeah Richa.. its all done and dusted. We got thissss”

We walked in to the meeting room and yes.. it was one of the most boring meetings of my life. The manager blabbered on and on and on and on.

“ asljdhihnerhfbodjbfjksbdh? Kjhsdlkjsd yes yes we have to start raising the kjashdkj yuasgdkjhb lkajsdh           skdhi isn’t it?? “apparently that was all I understood. He then gave a pause to his blabber.

“ yes sir.” We answered together.

“hgdfcd suydfgeru uygfuer uygfu and.. is there any shdkh? Richa??” he looked at her. It was her to take over from here. As expected, Richa’s panic paid off and the meet well excellent.

She spoke for a solid 45 minutes with absolutely zero fumbling and her eyes confident as ever. A few gestures here, a few there, she divided the slides equally and killed it all.

People started to get up and leave from the room that had literally turned into an oven in my head. I felt like a cookie overbaked with all this blabber.

“ Thanks Kashyap!” Richa spoke to me in a relaxed tone. Finally, the panic mode was switched off.

“ free for Sunday?” she spoke picking up her stuff from the table.

“ I have a thing at my friend’s place. Need to attend that. Kind of a friends meet after a long time” I answered back.

“ so.. um.. kavya is gonna be there?” she spoke with a bit of hesitation.

“ yeah she will be there.” I jolted my reply immediately.

I’m not really great at reading expressions but I could sense Richa's face getting straight with her wide eyes and smile vanishing.

“ ok then carryon.” She walked away with her laptop in her arms.

I stood there looking her pony wave from behind. I dint really feel good about the way she left abruptly. I did have a tiny void in me that was worried for her.

 

Chapter 2- 17^th November

I dressed up in a neat white formal shirt and grey pants. I wanted to look my best today. I sprayed the perfume all over myself and maybe yes. It was a bit too much. The air made me cough a little too. I glanced at myself in the mirror and I was sure I was all set to go. But at the back of my mind, I was still a little worried for Richa. She hadn’t even texted me since the past two days.

By the time I reached Ishaan’s house, I could already see few of their guests seated in the living room. My eyes were only fetching for one person through out the time.

“heyyy Kashyap..! hi.!!!” Ishaan waved at me and made his way towards me. I stood at the arch of the door in search of familiar faces.

“ Ishaan??” I calmed him down from his hurry tone and spoke my bit.

“kavya??” I finally uttered the name.

“ tchh!!... they are all upstairs just go” Ishaan answered straight.

I wanted to quickly walk up the stairs and see Kavya immediately. But timing had another plan for me. Everybody gathered around the living room to wish Mr. and Mrs. Gupta. The formal wishes, the toasts and the cake cutting were all proceeding in no time. Kavya too had come downstairs to give a hand to Ishaan with the work. I couldn’t stop looking at her in the blue bodycon dress with the delicately knitted sleeves falling over to her elbows. Her hair and face with no filters made her stand out. My heart really raced wanting to talk to her. But I had no clue how she would take it. I just waited until I got a pace to actually talk to her.

The house started to hustle with all the other guests while Ishaan secretly picked up a Whiskey Bottle and gestured us all to come upstairs.

As we sat having a sip from our glasses, everybody spoke their bit and the regular roast continued for another half an hour. Meanwhile something unusual caught my ear.

“ So is Tanay picking you up?” Diya Spoke looking at her watch.

“ Probably yeah he must have started by now” Kavya spoke.

I couldn’t process the information so quickly. How did I not know about this? Who Tanay? How did it.. I gave a strong eye contact to Ishaan.

“ Did you know it already?” my eyes conversed with him.

“ trust me dude.. I had no clue” he gestured with raised brows.

Kavya’s phone rang and she walked out of the room excusing herself. I dint know how to react. I waited a while and I decided to go out and check on her.

As I stepped out, she was just done with her call and we bumped into each other.

“ hey..” I said with all the awkwardness in the world.

“ hi” she gave a tiny response.

“ um.. how have you been?”

“ Im good”

“ so..?” I was out of my words.

“ hey listen. Can we just talk? Its too awkward for a small talk. Can we?” I finally put up some courage in my words.

She dint reply a word. But she dint move either.

“ Ill take it as a yes then.. I need to just tell you a few things”

She gave me an eye contact and I understood it was my turn to talk.

“ listen kavya.. I know the break up phase was bad. But its hard for me to move on. You keep me on read, I wakeup everyday hoping for a reply from you. But that never happens. I feel I am just stuck. And now, I see you have moved on. I am happy for you. Im sure Tanay whoever it is, is a great guy. but.. I just don’t know what to do. I don’t feel good about this. Do you get it? “ I had blabbered so much and waited for her response. It was indeed better than what I expected. I thought she would just listen and walk away.

“ Kashyap... what can I say? I know there are always two versions after a breakup. The one that moves on and the one that doesn’t. You know…, Tanay just .. just makes me so happy. I just subconsciously know him so well and so does he. A day without his message seems incomplete. You know, you just feel like you have that one person in the universe who will listen to you even if everybody turns their heads away? You tend to have a purpose for your life, a purpose to wake up every day. That is all you need dude.. and I think I have found my purpose. try to understand. .” Kavya spoke and gave me a pat on my shoulder.

We stood there in mere silence and she took a step forward and gave me a warm hug.

“ its going to be okay.” She said and walked back into the room.

 

 

Chapter 3 -The day after.

I had stayed up late because of these people and now I had woken up late. I was stuffing the breakfast in my mouth and ruined my coffee in the hurry as well.

“ Hey you reached?” I texted Richa.

“ yes” came the reply. The classic crisp one-word reply. I knew she was somewhat not okay with everything.

“ okay. I’m on my way. Running late.” I texted her back.

I stopped at the cafeteria and grabbed a hot chocolate. I walked up to my floor and fetched for Richa. She was seated in her desk seriously working on her laptop. I made my way to her and placed the hot chocolate on her desk. Hot chocolate was the well-known mantra to cheer up Richa.

She looked at me from the edge of her eye. And I’m sure I gave the most idiotic formal smile.

“shut up.” she said.

I immediately shut my mouth and walked to my cubicle. I could see a cup of double expresso. I made myself comfortable in my chair and sipped the coffee. Dam was it perfect. Yess. A double expresso with one portion milk and no sugar. My nerves felt activated from the core.

“had your coffee?” Richa walked over to me.

“oh was it you.. oh thanksss!!” See I told you suspicious behavior.

“you were late so I knew you would have messed up your morning coffee.” She talked with hardly any expression in her face.

“ well thanks.. “

She was about to turn back and I couldn’t help but call her name,

“ Richa!”

“ yes?” The office staff formal reply it was.

“ are you ok?” I asked her.

She looked at me for a few seconds and then talked.

“ why do you think I am not?”

“ because you haven’t texted me all this while. And you haven’t been active.”

“ does it matter to you if I do not text you?”

“ yes it does. A day without your active talk feels incomplete Richa.” Wait,.. what was I saying? These words felt familiar. I suddenly had a huge DeJa’Vu as I talked. But all I knew was, I kept on talking.

“ You are important to me.” I spoke firmly.

“ How does that matter?” She spoke.

I really was shocked to connect all the dots.

“ Can you excuse me for a minute? Ill be back.” I spoke and rushed to the loo.

I stood Infront of the mirror and reminded myself every word Kavya had told me. I questioned myself a hundred times.

Does Richa make me happy? Yes.

Do I know her entirely. Yes.

Do I like spending time with her? Yes.

Does she stand for me every time? Yes.

Does she Listen to all my bull shit? Yes.

Have I subconsciously been liking her company all this time? Have I fallen for her that I expect her to text me every day?

Why do I care for her so much?

I had million questions running in my head. I decided to sort them slowly.

I realized, I had literally been falling for her all along. Maybe all this was dabbed under my stupidity where I labelled myself with Kavya’s memories. Maybe I just assumed that I couldn’t move on. Maybe it was all in my head and I missed out to see the reality.

I went back to her and wanted to explain her everything. I had a strong gut that she would definitely understand. I walked back and stood there at her cubicle and she paused her work to look at me. I gave the same idiotic smile again.

“ shut up.” she spoke again but with a hint of smile. I walked back to my place with a new satisfaction discovered. I opened my WhatsApp, clicked on Kavya’s profile and tapped the delete option. I dint know why I was doing that, but all I knew was, doing that was important to mark the beginning of some new smiles. I dint want anymore flickering in my head. I felt I had discovered my purpose now. I don’t know if I actually did but at least, I thought so.

In a way, I was very glad to have met Kavya and have had that discussion.

Chapter 4- A month later

Things had been going really well with Richa. I had gathered up so much courage to ask her out. And yes, she had understood my entire story and we had even gone out on a couple of dates. I had started to look at life from a new perspective. It had been a long time since I had been this happy.

I sat in my office and it was a regular day at work. I was almost done with the deadlines and was rushing over the last quarter.

“ My tummy needs some spring rolls.” Richa’s text popped. The fact that we texted each other from cubicles few meters apart was indeed funny. But we did enjoy talking and sometimes even flirting over texts.

“ Lets eat on the way home” I typed back

“ wonderful. Ill just wind up my work quickly”

“ hey can I ask you something? Why dint you ever feel like giving up on me?” I tapped my send button.

“ because I knew you liked me too.” the reply came in a couple of seconds.

“ you really did?”

“ why else do you think I stayed? It was very clear from your end too. I even knew the fact that you yourself dint know that you were into me 😉”. The message bought a smile on my face instantly.

My mobile rang interrupting the chat. I looked at the screen and there was an new number popping up.

“ hello.” There was a woman on the other end.

“hello who is it?” I replied precisely.

“ kavya.”

I was taken back for a second. I couldn’t figure out why she had called me.

“ you don’t have my number?”

“ um.. actually I guess I have lost it.” I answered with hesitation. I dint want to tell her that I had deleted it.

“ I see. Well… One of my friends is about to join in your company. He just wanted some referral information. Is it ok if I just forward your contact?”

“ yeah sure not an issue.” I assured her.

“ um.. so.. how have you been? No texts lately?” she uttered.

“ well.. maybe I discovered greater things. And yeah, I wanted to say this to you Thank you.”

“ thanks ?? for?”

“nothings in particular. Maybe that talk helped me.”

“ that’s nice.”

There was an awkward silence for almost 10 seconds and none of us spoke.

“ so how is Tanay?” I had nothing else to speak. So I just choose to ask about her relationship. That’s right. I choose to ask about my Ex girlfriend’s current boyfriend.

“ um.. that was.. actually.. i.. I kind of…” she murmured words to herself.

“ sorry what?”

“ ah.. we broke up” she spoke out loud.

“ broke up why??” I know it was none of my business. But my curiosity made me ask.

“ you don’t want to know it Kashyap. Let it go.”

“ well ok then. Take care” I dint want to dig deeper and I calmly cut the call.

I was still unsatisfied with what she said. I decided to call Ishaan and talk to him about this. I had the feeling that he would be knowing something.

“ hey Ishaan.!”

“ hi how r u doing. Sup?”

“I’m fine. Listen, Kavya just called me for some work and she said she broke up with Tanay.. did you know this?”

“ yeah man.! But. I just dint want to ruin your head. So never talked about it to you.”

“ why would my head be ruined? What is it?”

“ well.. okay I’m going to tell you but, please promise me you would never let people know that you know this ok.”

“ okay..? I’m listening?”

“ so the other day, after you guys talked, she mentioned she had some reality checks. The fact that you had stopped to text her made her realize how much you mattered to her. Everything she had mentioned to you about her relationship and about Tanay,… did not really exist in her life. Also, she realized that Tanay was just a rebound and, the true fact was that she had never moved on from you. She assumed she had moved on. but the reality hit her a lot later. After meeting you and talking to you, she said she realized so many things in one go. So yeah, that is it. and she is not really in a place to even think of moving on from you. now, please… please …don’t let people know this. Just stay happy and stay out of it. Do not disturb your mind worrying about her. Its ok to normalize it. Some people just can’t choose to move on “

I needed a while to process everything. All this time, I had thought it was me who had not moved on. But the tables flipping was very surprising. we were both under different assumptions of moving on until the reality hit. Maybe this was meant to be. The ways of destiny are always strange. I assumed I was on one side of the story and suddenly, boom!! here I am on the other end of the tale.

“ hey. Lets leave?”

Richa interrupted my overthinking and pulling me back to reality.

“ yeah” I said with a awakened tone.

She gave me a comforting smile and gave me a hug around my neck from behind my chair.

I leaned on to land soft kiss on her arms and gave her a smile.

“ Thanks Richa!” I spoke looking into her eyes.

“ shut up” she said with a giggle.